Judge Dredd Megazine 265 - 11 Dec 07

Cover by Bryan Talbot

Gavin Hanly: After a rather oddly composed Anderson illustration a few issues back, Talbot's return to Satanus makes for a much more successful cover. If only Tharg could get him on a Dredd one-off...

James Mackay: It’s a good stock pose – Dredd reacting to a savage foe.  Does its job, lets the reader know that there’s some future tech and some dinosaurs.  Stands out from the other mags on the Borders shelves.  A bit throwaway, but there’s nothing wrong with that every now and again. 

The Listener Script: Gordon Rennie Art: Boo Cook Letters:Annie Parkhouse

Fuddlard shows off his knowledge...

Synopsis: Shelb Fuddlard is a member of a judge-spotting club who manages to pick up one of Dredd's radios after it's shot off in a fight. He uses it to tap into Dredd's communications and feedback info to his club members (without telling them how he's getting the information). However, perps are listening into the club meetings at Planet Gary and are using it to foil justice department raids. Dredd finally tracks down Fuddlard and the perps who were eavesdropping - who take Fuddlard hostage. Dredd kills the perps and takes Fuddlard away - telling him he'll be getting a mind-wipe no the way to the cubes...

GH: Hmm. It's actually quite difficult to know what to make of this one. On the surface, it's a pretty decent Dredd one-off, with Rennie making good use of Dredd's regular haunt, the Planet Gary bar. It also features some of the best Dredd artwork from Boo Cook that I've seen and the use of the plasteen skull with the ricochet bullet is a great touch.

Then there's the fairly obvious dig at the fans - and I guess I'd have to count myself in this number, given the website and all - who perhaps obsess slightly too much about this sort of thing. Maybe Rennie's got a point here, but it does come across as rather bitter - especially when taken with the Simon Davis article later on (more of that later). Sometimes I'd rather 2000AD just got on with the job of making the comics the best they can, and keep the fan criticism to the messageboards where it probably belongs.

Still - taking that aside, it's a nice enough throwaway strip.

JM: I’m an on-and-off reader of Empire magazine.  One of the things that really annoys me about it is the way that they keep referring to discussions on their messageboards, sometimes actually asking specific contributors to give them a (free) quote.  That’s because I’m not fanatical about films, and certainly not about Empire magazine, and so I can’t be arsed to go to their website, let alone get to know the no doubt fun and frolicsome community there.  What do the many readers who don’t post here think about the repeated mentions of the very small online communities on this website and at 2000adonline.com, I wonder?

It’s difficult to read this Dredd objectively (of course, there’s no such thing as a completely objective opinion), because it satirises particular people who I know.  It seems to me that it’s a sad state of affairs if the Judge Dredd Megazine has sunk to lampooning the hobbyist community that’s built up on a couple of websites hosted by Rebellion, and it seems that this script’s jokes, such as the “Lawgiver Mark I” references, wouldn’t make much sense to anyone who doesn’t know individuals and frequent topics of discussion within that community, or maybe on comics websites in general.  But the appeal of 2000AD was always that it didn’t appeal exclusively to Comic Book Guy: of the several people I know “in real life” who read it, not one reads another comic, and I’m the only one who’s bothered to look at these websites, let alone contribute to them.

This is far too long a review for a slight one-off story (and I’ve not even mentioned the saving grace of Boo Cook’s lovely art), but on the other hand this script seems emblematic of a certain contempt in editorial circles for the “sad” hobbyist fans that’s really quite unworthy.  Giving straight abuse to your fan base is, after all, a policy last seen in a certain speech by Gerald Ratner… 

Short Fuse Script: Al Ewing Art: Robin Smith Letters: Ellie De Ville

Kong leads the way...

Synopsis: Milton D Sweetman visits his robo-shrink as he's suffering from a great fear of judges. His brain is scanned and they realise that he has a suicide box implanted on his brain - a bomb designed to go off if he talks to the judges. He used to be a crime blitzer, and was given a mind wipe and personality change as a retirement present - with a fear of judges so that he wouldn't break the law.

Sweetman decides to channel his fear by contacting a dominatrix, Miss E Whippkrax. This helps to put his fear in place until he finally decides to make a visit to her - only to find her wearing a dominatrix styled judge's uniform. Boom.

AC: The Tales of the Black Museum has possibly been the best addition to the Megazine in recent years apart from Jack Point. The premise behind the tales is an almost perfect device, allowing for limitless "Tales from the Crypt" style stories set in the Meg. This month, the criminally underused Al Ewing brings us a highly entertaining one-off with a great twist at the end - managing to take in a bit of Dredd-lore (this month - Suicide Boxes and Crime Blitzers) in the process. Great accompaniment by 2000AD veteran Robin Smith too.

Now if only we could have something like this for the weekly to replace Future Shocks.

MC: A damn near perfect script by Al Ewing: inventive, blackly funny and yet underneath it all very tightly controlled in a way that certain of the more mature writers seem to have forgotten.  Of course, we’ve seen every element in this story somewhere else before, but nonetheless this is a very enjoyable remix.  Robin Smith contributes his usual humorous caricatures that make the tale fair zip along. 

Blood of Satanus 3 - The Tenth Circle 9: The Heart of Darkness Script: Pat Mills Art: Hicklenton Letters: Simon Bowland

Dredd wishes Satanus used breath mints...

Synopsis: As the bombs are set, Dredd thinks that something is wrong, as Satanus isn't doing anything to protect himself. Suddenly, all the judges are frozen with fear as they step on the dark matter from the "coward bloodprints" who were executed. X face gives Dredd to Satanus, but Dredd manages to break free of the spell. Satanus is distracted by Arkane as Dredd fires dark matter bullets into the beast. Dredd kills X-Face and feeds Satanus his own heart - sealing the source of dark Matter. Dredd promises Arkane a judicial pardon and he and Meg decide to stay in Kaluza. Dredd and the team head home...

GH: So. It's over. Finally.

First of all - to balance things out, I should come up with some positive things to say about Blood of Satanus. Hicklenton's art has been pleasingly insane throughout the series. There have been problems with it, more of that in a moment, but when he pulls his act together, he's certainly capable of a superlative set-piece - and some of the Satanus scenes in this week's episode back that up, along with a great Dredd shot on the last page.

Unfortunately, his work throughout The Blood of Satanus has been incredibly inconsistent, something that's particularly evident in the opening spread of this episode. The top half of the page looks like it's been drawn in the cheapest ink pen imaginable and half of the pictures look unfinished - and this is a criticism that can be aimed at the whole run. Is this a printing issue - it's sometimes hard to tell. If Hicklenton was able to maintain some form of consistency in his work, this would have considerably elevated the strip. After all, when he's on form he's an excellent artist who's certainly not afraid to take risks with his interpretation of Dredd. I'd like to see him in the Megazine again, but on a couple of one-offs until he really gets his mojo back.

As for the story, I'm afraid I find myself unable to locate any redeeming features in it. 9 months of frankly appalling storytelling with the ten levels of hell simply being used to trot out cliché after cliché. Politicians are corrupt! Cowards are bad! Etc. etc. This is coupled with Mills' Dredd's own version of Tourette's where he seems compelled to utter bold and clichéd statements such as "eat your heart out" in this episode or "one man can make a difference" a few months back. It's just cringeworthy to read, and I can't quite understand why this was allowed to see print. Is it supposed to be funny? Who knows?

But dear god, let's hope Satanus stays dead this time.

JM: And so, my friends, the end is near / and so I face / the final Blood of Satanus! 

t’s a tale that’s divided brothers, started world wars, and lead our civilisation to the very brink of oblivion… no, wait, it hasn’t. It turns out that it was just a comic book story all along!  There were good things about it – a relentless energy, an inventiveness, a punky raw attitude, and the return of John Hicklenton – and there were bad things about it – stilted dialogue, too much disregard for some quite fundamental attributes of the character of Dredd – but overall, it was neither the disaster it’s been painted online, nor the triumph implied by certain of its defenders.  Certainly I’ll buy the graphic novel. 

One thing I wonder, though, is whether the art is reproducing poorly for some reason.  There are certain places – like Dredd’s chin at the bottom of the sixth page – where the fine lines seem to be coming out almost smeared, as though photocopied at the wrong setting.  Pure speculation on my part, but the contrast between this and the preview art accompanying the interview elsewhere on this website is quite marked.

I do hope that Hicklenton’s next 2000AD project is on a script by one of the more self-controlled writers (like Dan Abnett), so he can show exactly what his style can do without the distraction of an equally “out there” script.  But overall, I think BOSIII has been a pretty enjoyable ride: not a classic, but not an object of contempt either. 

Pizen: Impossible - Part 3 Script: Simon Spurrier Art: Steve Roberts Letters: Ellie De Ville

Ratty to the rescue...

Synopsis: The swampstinger cuts out Fink's heart, but it seems that the Cursed Earth has changed him considerably as he doesn't die. Instead, Ratty comes to his aid and takes out both of the Swampstinger's eyes. She slips and falls to her death in a pit. Fink decides to use his own heart and pretend it was from the Swampstinger. The King eats it and starts to die - the resulting gasses killing all his followers, who Fink locks in with the King to die as he makes his escape.

GH: The biggest revelation from this series and the Angel Gang one that preceded it is Steve Roberts' art. His work for the past few months has easily been his best ever, and he's made a huge leap in his development as an artist. It's been stunning throughout and, while taking on some obvious McMahon references, sees him developing a real personal style. I'd love to see him use this on a series that's perhaps less humourous in its telling - or perhaps use this on the next series (if there is to be one) of Black Atlantic.

As for the story, it's been an entertaining romp by Mr Spurrier, even if it does make yet more of Dredd's enemies into comedic foils. Despite that, I'd be happy to see the Angel family make a return sooner rather than later.

JM: A very slight tale, this.  Fun enough in its own right, but unlike Spurrier’s previous Angels script this doesn’t seem to advance the character sufficiently, or provide a clever enough payoff, to make it memorable.  I do like the idea of Fink himself being the most poisonous creature in the Cursed Earth, but making his “heartlessness” literal feels wrong for some reason that I can’t quite work out: it seems daft to invoke the idea of logical impossibility in a script dealing with an animated skeleton with poison for blood, but that’s the nearest I can come to putting my finger on why this doesn’t quite work for me. 

Dredd Files
Screen Story: The Vampire Bites Back
PJ Holden Interview
Simon Davis Interview
Top 20 Sci fi Deaths
Small Press - Grey Days
New Movies

AC: Firstly - let's get to the interviews. We start with a preview of PJ Holden's Fearless which also acts as a small interview with the artist. The strip certainly looks good, and Holden always comes across as one of the most pleasant people in the business.

Alas, it would appear that the same cannot be said of Simon Davis. Davis is clearly an exceptional artist, and one who has a lot of fans in the regular readers. So then, why does his interview spend so much time deriding those very fans? Too much of the interview is spent telling us why we should just stay quiet if we don't like a story - a stance that I absolutely have no time for. The interview also goes onto talk about a controversy over Stone Island's "big cock" - a controversy that I seem to have missed completely. All in all, a lot of this should have been left out of the interview as it colours what is otherwise a very good article. Davis work is certainly excellent, but this piece really didn't do him any favours.

As for the rest of it? Slightly odd to have an article extolling 30 Days of Night as the triumphant return of the vampire film only for the same writer to say that the film is basically "not very good at all" later in the issue. The Dredd Files is still as pointless as ever and the top 20 Sci Fi deaths is filler at best.

JM: For the second month running, Michael Molcher provides for my money the most interesting piece in the whole magazine, a well-written Simon Davis interview that’s both probing and illuminating.  It was really good to be reminded of just how good a portrait painter Mr Davis is as well – I can’t be the only person who looked at that painting on page 22 and wondered just how much he charges for commissions. I do hope, however, that Molcher gets an interview with one of the older artists some time soon – maybe Brian Bolland or Ron Smith?

Almost as interesting was the short promo for the irrepressible PJ Holden, and I do hope that someone from Marvel was reading it. 

I’m less sure about the “Top Twenty” sci-fi deaths, which took the odd decision to include several imaginary scenes, and a strictly surface-level skim across the vampire in cinema.  Alec Worley also sadly didn’t get much to chew on in the film reviews this time round.

Small Press boasts some nice old-fashioned art, but the scripts are rather too one-joke for my taste.

AC: Thankfully the Megazine is getting a bit of an overhaul next issue, and it's in dire need of one.

But, I can't help but feel that a big change is needed in the format, not necessarily the strip content. With only 4 new stories a month, the chance of the majority of them being duffers is just too great. The Megazine really seems to have lost its identity over the past couple of years - ever since the page reduction. Personally, I'd say it's got about 6 months to prove its worth - and then maybe consider being repackaged as a quarterly/bi-monthly with a higher strip count.

One way or another, it needs a major shot in the arm - and soon.

Best story: Fink Angel

JM: A fairly average slate comes to an end.  I do feel that I got ₤2.99’s worth of enjoyment out of this issue, but really not much more than that.  The next issue’s line-up looks promisingly solid, however: let’s hope that 2008 sees a real return to form. 

Best story: Tales from the Black Museum