Who? Dares Wins - Part 1

"Dread" gets ready to show who?'s the boss...

Synopsis: In a remote Calhab smallholding, comic book writer and artist Kenney Who? is inking a story featuring a Scots superhero called The Hoolie. The strip shows Mega-City judges victimizing an innocent citizen until the avenging spirit of The Hoolie manifests beside the beaten cit and lays out all the judges.

Kenny’s son, Wee Kenny, warns his dad that Mrs. Who is approaching, and Kenny tries to hide the evidence of his drawing. Izzy scolds her husband for wasting his time on nonsense. The flying postman arrives with a letter from Mega-City 1, offering to publish his trashzine for 8,000 credits. Kenny heads off for Mega-City 1 against his wife’s counsel, with Wee Kenny in tow. On arriving, they are refused entry, but an unexpected diversion gives Who? time to stamp his own entry visa, and Wee Kenny’s, and they go to meet Kenny’s prospective publisher. Not fully understanding the concept of vanity publishing, the disappointed artist has to be restrained by his son, who takes him outside to cool off.

DK: It’s a remix of one of John Wagner and Cam Kennedy’s greatest hits. The panels from Who?’s comic, The Hoolie, are entertaining in their own right but the cognitive dissonance in the Who? family’s perceptions vs. reality are a sticking point. Vanity publishing is sooooo 1980s. Even in 2005 you don’t need a publisher - it’s easier just to do it yourself. If 8,000 credits is payable in advance then why doesn’t Kenny write back asking for a cheque instead of getting right on a transatlantic express? Simple story-telling expediency, that’s why. It’s a short-cut: a pretext to get Kenny Who? back in Mega-City One because he’s funnier there.

I liked it, but not that much. My sympathies lie with Izzy Who?: a very sensible woman, and surely a stabilising influence on Kenny.

LS: Wagner kicks of the ongoing Scottish and farting gags theme running through the meg this month with a great tale that so far more than matches up the Who?s' previous outings. With Dredd only actually appearing as a comic strip parody (and in the Metro strip this month), is this the least we've seen of Dredd in his own magazine? Not that this is a problem, when there's so much going on in this particular tale to distract from the fact. My only one concern might be for people not familiar with the character, but to those people I say, get ye to an Extreme Edition!

I can't praise Cam Kennedy's art enough here, ably abetted by Chris Blythe, who's work always seems best when paired with Cam. There are certain artists from the olden times who seem to be visibly marking time and cashing the cheques, but you can really see the effort that Kennedy has put into this one.

Deus X - Part 1

Shimura prepares for battle...

Synopsis: A Hondo City bullet train is attacked by an android shuriken bomb disguised as a commuter, killing all the passengers in the carriage. Inspector Inaba is the first judge to arrive on the scene. A terrorist techno-cult, Deus X, claims responsibility for the attack. The cult is dedicated to the dead cyber-genius Masamune Taoka, who transformed himself into a superhuman technological monster. For her part in Taoka’s downfall Inaba’s name has been added to the cult’s assassination list. Inaba is placed under 24 hr guard and kept out of the investigation.

In the Ronin District, Taoka’s daughter Amber seeks out Shimura to enlist his help in destroying Deus Ex. She has worked hard to rescue the image of the Taoka Corporation and doesn’t want it damaged by the cult’s activities. Suddenly a cyborg assassin opens fire on them both and Shimura throws himself and amber on the floor.

DK: “The Shinkansen. The bullet train.” Okay then. But are we still impressed by it in the 23rd century? I can’t help but think that in the hands of John, Alan or Pat it’d be patched up and creaking along, a piece of outmoded junk, a satire on the detrimental effects of privatising utilities, and the speed with which today’s technological marvels become tomorrow’s antiques.

Anyway: the story. A horrible atrocity with the android shuriken bomb gives Andy Clarke a prime opportunity to draw a finely detailed scene of carnage. So far so good. But then - oh no. We’re revisiting the saga of Masamune Taoka, the sub-Akira mutating tentacular cyber-monster, by way of a dedicated cult not dissimilar to the Aum cult that in real life unleashed a sarin gas attack on the Tokyo underground in 1995. At this point I’ve completely lost interest and there are still three pages to go.

LS: Robbie Morrison's long absence from the House of Tharg has not helped this reader in following the ongoing adventures of his rogue Judge Shimura in the Meg, nor his rogue..erm Rogue Dante in the Prog. The main difference between the two strips is that I want to get back up to speed with Dante's adventures, whereas Shimura has never really gripped me. This story harks back to the first Shimura tale, but what has happened in between is something of a blur. Elsewhere in the Meg, Gordon Rennie probably explains why that is, with his critique of "How to write a Japanese character" encompassing all the cliches that Shimura falls into.

As with the recent Inaba story, Andy Clarke's art isn't up to his usual standard, and looks like something we'd have seen from him a few years back.

Killoden - Part 4

Middenface spreads his wisdom...

Synopsis: Half a million mutants fleeing Scotland converge on the site of the new Killoden theme park and around the Falkirk wheel, and blow up roads leading to the area to hamper the Kreeler advance. The news media report live from the scene, asking mutant rebels their reasons for fighting.

Bonnie Charlie’s father, the Lord of the Isles, arrives with two truckloads of reinforcements – the Irish Irregulars – including the immensely tall Tharg Ennis.

When the Kreelers attack they bomb the Falkirk wheel, and the Kreelers army sweep the mutant rebels before them. Middenface McNulty rides his quad bike toward a Kreeler armoured car, with Medusa seated behind him firing blindfold on his instructions. A blast throws them on the ground. As they get to their feet they find themselves at the mercy of Shawn Gadgie and Ironbroo.

DK: This has been a good staple of the Megazine. It has characters we can genuinely care about, suffering an awful plight, but determined to make the enemy pay for every indignity they’ve suffered.

I know there were plaudits from the online readership for the mutant vox pops to camera, but does it come across strongly enough in those pieces to camera that those mutants as good as know they are going to die? I’m not sure. It was a nice instalment, which captured the human side of the unfolding drama and didn’t rush the ‘medusa powers’ rescue that’s bound to happen sooner or later.

Funny as the Tharg Ennis cameo may or may not have been, I have idea what Garth Ennis looks like anyway, if that was important to the joke. I presume he’s quite a handsome lad then, and legendarily tall?

The farting Scotsman I didn’t get either. I noticed The Hoolie is one too, but there aren’t any farting Scotsmen in The Bogie Man that I’m aware of. I realize that farting statesmen are a staple of political cartooning going back to the 18th century but I might point out that Sir William Cumberland isn’t a real person with a public profile that might be dented by the realization that he farts too like the rest of us (in fact, more so). The four ‘fart’ panels drawn by John Ridgway, depicting an expression of total concentration in the face of Sir William, would be funnier if completely divorced from this story. Without the genocidal backdrop, I would suggest Cumberland could be seen as a sympathetic character who just wants to let one rip. Why would we mock him for it if we didn’t already know his heinous crimes?

LS: The Scottish farting gag round 2. It's a strange one is this McNulty series. It's continuing the mix of the mature theme and the sometimes immature jokes that has characterised all the Young Middenface tales to date. This odd and often jarring juxtaposition is seen at its worst in the scene where Cumberland tells the troops to slaughter the mutants and then....farts. In the past these disparate elements have often blended quite well, but this episode stretches things a little too far for my tastes. We've got the aforementioned fart, plus the self referential nature of Tharg Ennis (shouldn't he have a dial on his head?). It probably isn't helped by the fact that Wagner does this kind of in-joke seamlessly in the Kenny Who? story. Similarly, Rasby Nesbitt evokes the ghost of Garth Ennis' weakest Dredd fillers ("Blind Mate", anyone?).

With all that said, I'm still enjoying the underlying story that Grant is telling, and hopefully we'll see a swing to more serious style once the slaughter begins.

As for Ridgeway's art, it seems to be at the opposite end of the spectrum from Cam Kennedy's work on Kenny Who? in terms of effort, all scratchy lines and lumpen figures.

Lock-In - Part 2

The zombie has a snack...

Synopsis: Something has caused a lock-down in Psi-Division, and Psi judges suspect there may be a supernatural cause. A dead perp in the mortuary returns to life and stalks the corridors, ultimately attacking prone judges in their dormitory. The reanimated killer blows his arms off by trying to fire two lawgivers at once. Armless, it bits one judge in the neck before it is killed a second time.

Anderson visits the newly blinded Psi-judge Shakta, who has been pondering a potential romantic liaison with the witch-judge Gistane, who has been incommunicado since Anderson was brought out of her coma. Shakta had been researching death imagery in various belief systems before she was blinded. Anderson thinks it no coincidence that she saw an identical image to one in Shakta’s books in the mind of the killer now stalking the building.

Anderson probes the mind of the disturbed man brought in earlier claiming apocalyptic visions. In his mind Anderson sees still more cross-cultural death imagery.

A psionic probe is carried out on the body of the reanimated perp shot dead in the dormitory. The probe shows his mind has been rewired as if by surgery. While everyone’s attention is turned away, a strange mist swirls around the corpse’s head, and a switch on the psionic probe changes from ‘off’ to the ‘on’ position.

DK: I couldn’t help noticing that Anderson's perp has a Dave Hill haircut that looks like he cut it himself, and Judge Yughes looks like one of my old work colleagues.

I enjoyed this a lot. I’ve just been watching Resident Evil. This reminded me of that a lot, in that everyone is trapped in the building with a malevolent force that can animate the dead. It’s nice to see something properly scary going on in a Judge Anderson story.

LS: Now that Anderson's back on her feet, it's time for her to get involved in a proper story - hurrah. In fact, the only real shadow over this tale is the fact that it most likely ties in to the previous storyline. As it is, the idea of the Psi Judges under siege is one that doesn't need any extra continuity to work well, and may even be hampered by it. Still (ignoring the Gistane subplot), it's a spooky, simple tale so far. My only real fear is that, as with too many Anderson stories in the past, the fact that there are supernatural shenanigans going on will mean that things will resolve themselves with a spot of sudden psychic insight from Cass at just the right time to sort things out.

Ranson's art continues to impress, with some really moody art helping to crank up the horror elements.

Return to Casablanca - Part 2

Francis saves the day...

Synopsis: In the Rix Bar, The Bogie Man reminisces about his failed romance with ‘Ilsa’, and how she left him in Paris. Two crooks burst in to recapture the Albanian fugitive for their bosses, the McCurdies. Clunie gets rid of them with a few warning shots from a revolver he keeps hidden in his coat. Steve the barman, believing Clunie to be the new bar manager, is impressed by Clunie’s bravery and decisiveness, but confused by his continued insistence that they are in Casablanca.

In a cellar sweatshop, the McCurdies set their Albanian captives to work baking shortbread to sell during festival season. A show of defiance is quickly quelled just before the two henchmen return from the Rix Bar with the news that the missing girl is with The Bogie Man.

Back at the bar, Clunie persists in his fantasy of German-occupied Casablanca, and decides to go looking for Ilsa’s husband Viktor Laszlo, whom he imagines is a prisoner of the Gestapo. Walking through Edinburgh, Clunie sees a poster advertising Rab McNab’s one-man show and imagines it to be notification that the Gestapo are planning to torture Viktor in public.

DK: The Bogie Man is great fun. Cluny’s Casablanca delusion is nicely sustained, e.g. by incorporating the word “scuzi” into his fantasy as slang for the Gestapo. As for the Albanian illegals being forced to make shortbread, I’m willing to suspend my disbelief. There’s a gangster in an apron showing them how to make the stuff, which is priceless. “We no make Shortie!” is a powerful proclamation of defiance right up there with “Death to the Kreelers!” The line about ‘Ilsa’ finishing her crisps struck me as tragically romantic, and showed the Bogie Man’s real concern for ‘Ilsa’. He’s clearly deeply sentimental, however difficult it is for him to express his feelings.

This story deserves a great deal of reader goodwill. Who can fail to be touched by Cluny’s fundamental impulse to do right in a world gone wrong, and the wrongness of the shortbread slave labour trade?

LS: The Bogie man is always a joy to read, even if it means we have the third Scot and fart gag combo of the month. It's hard to be objective about this story, as I've been looking forward to it since I heard about this Casablanca plotline what must be near enough a decade ago. As with Kenny Who?, I wonder if it's accessible to someone not familiar with the character, but to those people I say, get ye to a copy of the Collected Bogie Man (The Paradox Press version has both the main tales)!

The only negative (and its' a very small one) is that I liked reading the Bogie Man in 20 page installments, thus allowing the insane momentum of the situations to build up. I may take a leaf out of Logan's book and store up the Bogie Man stories for a few months before reading them, the better to be sucked into his insanity.

Burial Party

It was unwise to bet against Koburn...

Synopsis: Judge-Marshal Koburn and his number two, Judge Bonaventura visit an outpost to attend the funeral rites of a fellow Cursed Earth Judge. Bonaventura is introduced to hard drinking by a group of battle-scarred former Mega-city judges who also earned themselves a Cursed Earth posting. In her own case, she panicked while on patrol and shot an SJS judge in the foot.

Judge Vesey is cremated at dawn on a funeral pyre with appropriate honours. By now Bonaventura knows that things are done differently out in the Cursed Earth, including the dead man’s badge going to a woman Vesey knew in a township.

DK: This is just a perfect slice of Cursed Earth law-enforcer camaraderie and rough-housing. I liked the speed with which Bonaventura became accustomed to the group, resigned to her fate as an outcast for her faux pas with the SJS. I loved the idea of these judges as a support group that doesn’t meet often, sharing their misery and taking comfort from the fact they’re not alone and there are like-minded souls they can booze with.

The mere fact that Koburn’s appearances are drawn by Ezquerra is usually enough for me.

LS: The Spirit of Garth Ennis rises again, though this time not in a cameo, but in this tale of hard bitten drinkin' folk. All it needed was a pint of Guinness and someone expressing their love for Laurel and Hardy over that nancy boy Chaplin and the illusion would have been complete. Also, with 'Fungal' Mungal, we see Rennie dipping into Gerry Finley Days namebag!

This story tells us two things. The first we didn't know but perhaps should have suspected: There's a whole lot of Long Walk Judges and Cursed Earth auxillary types who share the same laid back attitude to judicial regs as Koburn. The second thing we already knew: Things are done differently in the Cursed Earth, a point hammered home on nearly every page of every Koburn strip - we get it already, even if Bonaventura has only just cottoned on! On which topic, you're left wondering how Bonaventura ever made the full badge, what with the nervy SJS shooting antics we hear about, and her general dimness in spotting the recommended approach to Cursed Earth Judging - they do things differently there, love.

Of course, all that's a little harsh, and it's a fun enough strip with great art (even if it does keep Ezquerra from his rightful place - chained to a cubicle drawing Strontium Dog!). I'm just keen to see a Koburn up against more involved storylines and foes in order to test the characters mettle a little - it's all well and good being cool when everything is going his way, but let's shake him up a bit!

Miscellaneous Material inc.

• Colin MacNeil Interview
• Dreddlines
• Modesty Blaise Feature
• Metro Dredd
• Charley's War
• Dredd Files
• Heatseekers
  

DK: Charley’s War was a highlight of this issue, presenting about the best four consecutive episodes we’ve seen. These four were among the most poignant so far. The dramatic tension was kept up even with Charley taken out of the action. Even though I know this runs to 300 episodes plus, I wasn’t sure how (if?) Charley was going to make it. I think this is a good place to stop, but I hope it will return soon. I had become a bit complacent about Charley’s adventures. Maybe a bit of a break will make me less so.

Colin MacNeil pours out his soul in the interview, and it’s like we’re suffering right there with him. It reads like an artist’s journey into the heart of darkness. He’s toiling away there, and we’re lapping up this stuff (apart from Maelstrom, obviously. And Vanguard), without realizing the torment the artist is going through. Well, here it all is. It’s very instructive to be able to read this kind of testimony in such detail, especially for those of us who don’t draw.

It’s nice to see the Dredd Files on safe territory this issue. You can’t go wrong with The Judge Child, can you? A brilliant series that allowed John Wagner to really branch out and give readers something to look forward to – something totally unexpected coming their way with every chapter.

Jonathan Clements tells a good story in his anime review feature. I don’t really get anime. I’ve enjoyed feature films like Nausicaa and Roujin-Z, but I’m not a fan of the genre. I think I know a bit more about why I’m not keen on it after reading Clements’s most recent piece.

Apart from the central idea of Genolympics in Metro Dredd, that genomic manipulation of the body is an inevitability of future science, hence a reprise of the Luna Olympics with genetics in place of bionics, this was lost on me. I didn’t know who had done what to whom, much less did I care.

Scott Gray’s column was informative. Hard Time: 50 to Life isn’t the sort of comic I’d normally buy, so this was a handy guide to what I’ve missed: clearly something quite unusual.

A big raspberry to Sledge Hammer! I used to come home pissed and find this was on, and wish it wasn’t. DVD? Money for old rope.

I’d like a bit more insight from Si Spurrier’s movies page, really. The guy who said “well, I like post-apocalyptic movies too” speaks for me. And I’m not so sure about Mad Max II being better than its precursor. Surely both were good?

I can’t disagree with Gordon Rennie. We’ve all thought it: “Shit! I could do foreign judges. Piece of piss!” Alas, it was an over-subscribed field, so our proposal for a Lapland/Falkland Islands/Polynesian Judges strip got returned unopened. C’est la vie…

LS: The Colin MacNeil article was another interesting read, and I find these are interviews are the first thing I turn to in the Meg. Charley's War ends (for now) on a high, and the Metro Dredd is one of the very few to go some way to capturing the spirit of the weekly (though I'm not convinced by Steve Roberts art).