2000AD Prog 1421 - 15 January 2005
	Judge Dredd (Wagner / Brashill) Second City Blues (Kek W/ Pleece) Slaine (Mills / Langley) Caballistics Inc. (Rennie / Reardon) Nikolai Dante ( Morrison / Burns) Synopsis by David Knight Review by Gavin Hanly 2nd Opinion by Eric Moore Summaries and reviews contain spoilers for this issue.

GH: Normally, John Burns can be counted on to deliver a striking, exciting cover. His recent Mach 1 cover is a prime example. However, he's dropped the ball when it comes to this week's offering and we're left something rather underwhelming.

Leaving aside the fact that the cover looks awkward and posed, like the two characters don't know where to stand, the main problem is Dante's face. Ok, the man is supposed to have the odd lech, but just look at it. He looks like he's in a Carry On film. Dear, oh dear.

EM: What’s Tom Savini doing here? Not a bad cover from Mr Burns which certainly would have me picking it up and having a flick though if I didn’t know of 2000 AD.

Don’t know if I agree with Comics International's endorsement at the top, though.

After the Bombs - Part 2

Gaia re-lives her past crimes...

Synopsis: One day after Total War’s terrorist campaign is ended, Mega-City One begins picking up the pieces. The judges continue to interrogate Total War leaders Odwin Bierce and Paul Ruskin (‘Jericho’), whom they have publicly declared dead. Information extracted under torture leads to further arrests. Judges are sent to capture Total War assassin Gaia Louise Innocenti, known to have committed nineteen murders, including that of Norman Spiller, Psi-Division’s best civilian pre-cog, who might have been able to foresee the terrorist nuclear plot if he had lived.

Innocenti, meanwhile, has returned to her apartment, gradually recovering from amnesia caused by a piece of shrapnel lodged in her head, which also unleashed latent psi-powers, giving her short-range premonitions. She foresees the judges’ raid on her apartment and flees moments before the judges arrive. The other four members of her terrorist cell arrive in a car to collect her, but judges are in pursuit as they depart.

GH: Occasionally, it's difficult to see where Wagner's sympathies lie in these "terrorists vs the judges" stories, but with Gaia's memories coming to the fore, especially the one of her drowning the child, it's pretty clear that she's a particularly nasty piece of work. It's also becoming clear that the piece of metal has brought the psi powers to the surface as opposed to her having them all along. As with Total War before it, it's this drip feeding of information, slowly building into the overall plot, that has really put Wagner firmly back on top as the best writer currently working in 2000AD, and perhaps in British comics.

Building on the premonitions of last week, this is becoming a highly successful epilogue to Total War and will hopefully all be collected with Terror and Total War in one big DC trade. Little touches like Dredd's assessment of Psi Division's work in the Total War crisis to Hershey telling Bierce that anything they do to him is "on the house" add together to make a wonderful script and keep Dredd easily at the top of this week's offerings.

On the art side, after a dodgy first page where the TV announcer looks a little out of place, Brashill continues to build on his success of last week, turning in art that suits the tone of the piece wonderfully and calling in echoes of MacNeil's style during Terror.

All in all, another stellar piece of work.

EM: This is odd – take a break from the news and the latest in the Indian Ocean and immediately read about clearing up from a disaster in Mega City One. The first half of page one was definitely unsettling and its kind of eerie that some of the script – presumably written by John Wagner quite a while ago – echoes some of the reports in the media.

Turn the page though and we’re definitely back in Dredd’s world, quite specifically Dredd’s world as he yet again hardly appears.

I’m enjoying this tale a lot, what with seeing the clean up, tying up the loose ends – with a partial explanation as to the PSI Departments uselessness – and the ongoing tale of Innocenti. Presumably the chunk of metal in her head has triggered a latent PSI talent and it’s a nice addition to the story.

I love Jason Brashill’s art – even if it does remind of the dark times in the early nineties when I only bought the Prog for the art – but I dunno here. Usually his slightly cartoony (and I use the term in the best possible way) style suits Dredd to a tee but I can’t help but think a more “serious” style would have suited the tale more.

Part 3

We think this is a goal. We're not sure.

Synopsis: Broadcast live from Birmingham’s Bullring shopping centre, abandoned after an anthrax attack, regional teams battle it out in the 2278 slamboarding Grandslam. The Blues face the Tornadoes in their first round match, in a sport where players on hoverboards compete to throw a potentially deadly ball into a target-shaped goal, and violent tackles are permitted. The Blues win the match 2-1, and the Tornadoes are eliminated from the tournament.

The Blues’ second match takes place in the basement car park, where they will play against the Ghouls: Frankenstein, Santos, Mummy, Zombie and Trog. Brian (‘Minger’) insults Mummy and causes a fight, which gets the blues penalty points awarded against the Ghouls. During the game Brian further provokes his rival, hitting Mummy in the face with the ball and breaking his nose. Getting blood on the ball is dangerous: the ball’s lethal capability is activated by changes in temperature or contact with fluids – and Minger is flying with the ball in his hand as it warms up.

GH: Oh dear. Unfortunately the prediction in last week's review proves a little too prescient. The minute the slamboarding starts, my interest plummets through the floor. Perhaps there's a target market for this sort of thing. Perhaps Tharg's going for the youth market with this future sport idea and lines like "Cor, look at the bazoomies on her!" Whatever it is, this clearly isn't aimed anywhere near me, as any element of plot that was built up last week is instantly blown apart for a long game of something I don't understand.

It's been mentioned that 2000AD should start testing series in smaller installments before letting them take over the comic for a long run and I cant help but think that should have been the case here. A four issue tale to help set up the world, and more importantly the rules of slamboarding would have either made this series easier to take - or even stopped it in its tracks. As it stands, this was the one story that I realised that I hadn't bothered to read before I started the review. As I read it just before writing these very words, I realised why...

EM: Oh boy. Every time I do a review here there always seems to be one strip I don’t like. And this is the one.

Terrible idea, bad script and very average art. If Tharg wants to pull in new readers, especially “the kids” then I guess a skateboarding riff would seem a good idea but not this way.

The first new strip of the New Year and it’s a stinker – surely the only way is up from here.

The Books of Invasions - Tara - Part 2

Slaine tries to think of something nice to say about Danu's new look...

Synopsis: In an ethereal realm, Slaine and Mongan are chased by the Earth Goddess, who berates Slaine for his poor kingship, when in fact what she means is the opposite of what she says. Mongan explains to Slaine that Danu is playing a game in which nothing makes sense, and he must humour her. This is a matriarchal realm, in which everything is inverted. Mongan appears to anger the Goddess by explaining that a woman is ‘a man outside in’, and she attacks them in the form of a fire-breathing dragon. Slaine and Mongan leap aboard one of his tribe’s sky chariots, where he is told that death is survivable in this Otherworld, but the dead are sometimes reborn still bearing the injuries they died of. The Goddess causes the sky chariot to crash, and on the ground Slaine and his companions are trapped between the dragon on one side and Morholt’s El Riders on the other. Morholt is the worst of the El Riders, and cuts off the heads of his foes with a great pair of shears.

Back at the siege of Tara, the defenders repel an attacking wave of beastmen. As ordered by Lord Odacon, the Fomorian warriors try to catch a sacred hare to use in sympathetic magic against their enemies.

GH: I'm beginning to understand something about how Slaine works.

When he doesn't really know what he's doing and is being led by others, whether it's Ukko or Mongan here, the tale becomes all the more interesting. He's basically a dull character, a cypher that drags us through the story. But when Mills tries to make the story center around him, that drags things down.

Here, the buffoonery at the beginning is faintly amusing, and Slaine's general ignorance of the situation puts Mongan in place as lead character - and the one who has to tell Slaine what he should be doing, how he should be acting and so on. Basically, Slaine was always a bit of an idiot, but a good fighter with it. Let others lead the main thrust of the tale and bring in Slaine for the action. If Mills remembered that more, we'd have more enjoyable issues like this. So while the strip, an the whole, may still be well past its sell-by date, at least it's not Second City Blues.

In addition to the temporary improvement in the script (I never believe it can last) there's some ever more wonderful art from Langley this week, especially with his depiction of the sky chariots. Now, a big picture of Slaine being hunted down by a dragon while escaping in the sky chariots - that would have been worth a wraparound cover. Bit of a missed opportunity there...

EM: It was great to be Slaine fan. Great stories great ideas (even the Leysers!) and great art. Pat Mills could do no wrong, I thought.

Until the one where Slaine became Robin Hood.

From then onwards it was kinda depressing to see one of your favourite characters going downhill fast. Clint Langley gave the strip a much-needed shot in the arm but it's not enough, is it? Just like Pat’s work on the latest ABC Warriors, week in week out nothing much seems to happen to progress the story in any significant way. So this week we have a rant on how women can’t be trusted, we’re in a world where you must do the opposite to what you want to get what you want yet doesn’t apply when it suits (jumping into the Sky Chariot) and what looks like Mills rehashing yet another old character (Elric).

Clint’s art – as usual – is sublime (dunno about that crotch shot though) but its not enough to detract from the failings of the strip.

Safe House - part 2

Jenny senses something deeper at the heart of their latest case...

Synopsis: Lawrence Verse gives Vesper Nox a beating. Nox has just confessed that his rock band raped and murdered a girl in their recording studio while conducting a black mass on the advice of Ethan Kostabi. The mass summoned a supernatural force that killed three band members in turn, leaving Nox the sole survivor. The stars are now in the same alignment as on the occasions when the other band members died. Jenny knows Nox isn’t telling them everything. Over the walkie-talkie, Ness tells Ravne there are intruders in the grounds. Ravne sends Jenny and Verse to investigate. They find armed men in monks’ habits at the back door of the kitchen. Jenny attacks them through a hail of machinegun fire and Verse kills three intruders with a shotgun. Ness reports that four more are breaking in through the conservatory. Verse identifies that the bodies are those of Dominican priests.

Earlier, in the East End of London, Chapter and Brand have found a false wall on the ground floor of the abandoned house. Jenny finds the football lost by a group of children more than 40 years before, and an old hat with a label saying it belongs to David Smith, which happens to be the real name of Caballistics Inc.’s employer, Ethan Kostabi.

GH: Another excellent episode, with Rennie developing their latest case in a fashion which keeps it edging closer to the secrets of Ethan Kostabi.

So far this is much more satisfying than their last outing, with a real feeling of the overall story arc moving forward a notch or two. Linking Nox back to Kostabi also makes the concerns of the "drugged up rock star cliche" as voiced by Martin in last week's review fade away, as the character fits more strongly into the overall dynamic. That combined with the events occurring in the East End make this a must read.

Plus, I have to admit, it is entertaining seeing Rennie making use of a great deal of "incomprehensible gibberish" with the character of Ness, especially after his "bloody foreigners" column in this month's megazine.

EM: Right from the off, I’ve loved this strip and each tale I’ve lapped up. No change here, especially as it looks like the team’s boss is going to be involved quite soon. Which is great in itself but it also looks like we’re going to get his origin – he is one of those kids in the flashback right?

Since the start of the series, I’ve been collecting a piece of Dom’s art from each tale and I’m really being spoilt for choice aren’t I? Fantastic stuff as usual along with his often over-looked panel compositions really moving the events along.

Agent of Destruction - Part 3

Dante shows off his swashbuckling...

Synopsis: The spy Nikolai Dante had been sent to kill, and who recognised him, turns out to be Lauren, whom he played with when they were both children. Suddenly Sagawa’s assassins attack, and Dante defends Lauren from them. Dante’s weapons crest jams Sagawa’s surveillance equipment while Nikolai and Lauren kill Sagawa’s mercenaries.

Dante orders the crest to stop jamming the surveillance so he can speak to Sagawa. He lies that he had to kill the mercenaries because they were intent upon claiming the Imperial bounty on his head. He ends their conversation by warning Sagawa against harming the children she’s holding hostage.

GH: I'm not entirely sure about the Deux ex Machina introduced here in the form of Dante's "childhood sweetheart". Last week I spent some time racking through the back issues trying to work out who this woman could be, and we now find out that it's no one we've seen before. Given the wealth of possibilities from the back issues (Lady De Winter was a favourite possibility) it seems off to start off with someone so out of left field that we see the need to introducer her in a picture postcard style image on this week's opening page. Perhaps Morrison is going somewhere with this, and his mother is using Lauren against him, so we'll give it a few more issues before coming down too hard on the idea.

Not much actually happens in the rest of this issue - just a big old fight scene. It's well done by Burns, but hopefully the story will start back up again proper next week.

EM: When the strip first started I thought it was okay at best. As time’s gone on I’ve thought less and less of it, to the point where I really find it an effort to bother following it.

The latest pirate riff is really outstaying its welcome for me and, again, the lovely art isn’t much compensation.