Prog 1369 - 3 December 2003
Cover by Henry Flint

Synopsis and review by Gavin Hanly
2nd Opinion by Leigh Shepherd

Summaries and reviews contain spoilers for this issue.

GH: Henry Flint show how you should really draw a klegg, putting Siku's efforts inside to shame. It's also a great action shot, and relevant to the story inside, making it stand out from the all too often stock pose covers we get. This is great work by Flint and is particularly notable for featuring his own colouring. Flint's mostly been paired up with Chris Blythe in the past, but there's some good work on show here. A bit too showy in some places perhaps, Dredd's helmet for example, but certainly decent enough to make us want to see more self coloured work from Flint.

LS: You can’t go too far wrong with a Flint cover. The colours are a little too obviously computer generated, though whether that’s because Henry is new to this method of colouring his work, or it's an attempt to psychedelize things is unclear. One positive I’ve noticed about recent covers in general is that they appear to be moving away from "standard pose/white background" into something a little more relevant and interesting.

Meatmonger - Part 5

Dredd practices for the Can Can

Synopsis: The parasites start taking over the kleggs and try to shut down the strobes controlling everyone. Dredd looks for a weapon and is confronted by a meatmonger, but is saved by Lundstrom. Lundstrom himself is attacked by a parasite but fends it off with his razor sharp teeth. Dredd hand Lundstrom a chainsaw as they head out just as the strobes turn off. The kleggs go mad and a riot ensues. Dredd decides to shut down the facility and teleport out a the safest option. Speers tells him the control of the ship is in a high security place where the Cophet overseers reside. They give the meatmongers their orders. But as they progress to the control, the parasites have already taken control and begin destroying the ship. Suddenly another parasite reashes Lundstrom and this time manages to take him over...

GH: As time goes on, I'm reluctantly beginning to see more merit in the "anti-Siku" brigade. While I still think he draws a decent Judge Dredd (I can't be bothered with all the "too many lines on his belt" etc. nonsense) Siku doesn't seem well suited for the more grotesque moments of the strips. His kleggs look particularly underwhelming, and the scenes full of monsters have me poring over the page closely before I can work out what's going on. Siku seems far more suited to the earlier Mega City sequences than in depicting the charnel house that should exist within the meatmongers' ship. As for the story itself, it makes more sense after last week's confusing "skike" moment - and I can now work out that the parasites are working against the meatmongers - not with them. Don't know what happened last week, but we seem to be back on track now. in all - this has me looking forward to next week's closer.

LS: I don’t think there are any new words to be said about how I feel about Siku's art - seek out my comments on the forum if you’re interested. Let's just say I don't think it's up to scratch on any level - even claims of dynamism I would suggest are small compensation for all the other problems with the art. As for the story, it seems to have been meandering for the past few weeks. The main problem I see with it is that Dredd doesn’t really have much to do, save wander from room to room explaining what should be (but unfortunately isn't) blindingly obvious from the art. This guided tour could have done with some twists - for example, if that other Judge had discovered the Starborn Things plot, and Dredd had been oblivious to it, yet intent on heading into danger, it might have upped the tension a bit. As it was, it seemed a little too linear to really take off. Not bad, but a bit too much padding and not enough action, a little like Devlin's recent tale. Well written, but uninvolving due to the lack of characters interaction with anything other than a bit of the old ultra-violence.

Holding the Fort

Vulpina makes a deal

Synopsis: The matriarchal Slandia are under constant threat of attack by the Zozanians, while also warding off the unwanted attentions of the mountain demons Vilix and Skrat. Commandant Vulpina goes to see the demons appealing for their assistance and promising that once the battle is over they will draw lots, and whoever loses will be their slave for a week. The demons agree and easily defeat the oncoming hordes. But when they arrive for their prize they are told that the winner has just dropped dead of excitement (in reality the cook who has died of old age). The demons begin a war od attrition as the Slandia realise they must do something. They call the demons back and say that the queen has offered to garrison the fort with demons, so they offer a particularly foul one as the slave. Horrifies the demons take the dead Lupa after all, as the foul demon is revealed to be a Slandian fighter in disguise...

GH: Tales of Telguuth is an odd one. After reading Moore's work in Tom Strong, I feel more able to appreciate these tales than I had before, as it's clear that the whole thing is completely tongue in cheek and playing up to the stereotypes of fantasy fiction (for example, the improbably dressed warrior women). This said, the story is more than a little odd indeed, and there is something every so slightly unsavoury about it. OK, so the women come out on top at the end, and defeat everyone, but without actually doing anything themselves. I've never been one for fantasy fiction, and maybe I'm missing something. On a first reading I almost enjoyed it, but when writing the synopsis and the review, there's something about the whole thing I just don't like. I come away reminded, "Ah yes, this is why more women don't read comics." Plus there's a particularly crap ending.

Jon Haward's art is enjoyable, however, and he's still the best match for Moore that there's ever been on Telguuth. If these tales keep on coming, then keep Haward on them. But perhaps Moore should try something new?

LS: Since John Haward's comedy art arrived on the Telguuth scene, I sense the stories have been received a little better. Certainly, they make it more obvious that (at least some of) the stories are not meant to be taken seriously, and that helps to warm you to the strip a little more. That said, how much you can warm to well worn fantasy scenarios being lazily lampooned is another matter. Perhaps if the characters were something we hadn't seen in a hundred other fantasy stories (spoof or otherwise). Perhaps if the plot twists where less forced and flowed a little better, it might make a difference. Here, they trick the demons after agreeing a bargain by er.. lying. However, all is not lost, for this is not the payoff. They then have to trick the demons again, this time - by dressing up in a Scooby Doo style monster get up. Hmmmmm....

Facing Mecha - Part 8

Syn gets in on the high kicking action...

Synopsis: Synnamon is taken into the heart of Mecha to Kassad, whose corporeal form is now shown by thousands of small units. Kassad begins to download Ascheta as Synnamon suddenly comes back to life, having faked infection of the virus through her photo-epidermal tattoos. But Synnamon can't fight against the might of Kassad and is soon knocked down. Kassad want to bring about the emergence of Mecha and two things are in its way: Macaulay's replacement program and "a superior freelance intelligence" - Ascheta. But Synnamon has transmitted everything she knows to the ESD through her neural net and promises that more will come to finish the job. But Kassad orders a "synnamoncoredump". Ascheta plugs into Synnamon causing her to scream in pain...

GH: The art takes a major step forward this week with the discovery of Kassad's current form - something of a mixture of the end of the Matrix Revolutions and the MPC in Tron. It's a nice touch to use all the smaller units to create his face, and Campbell & Townsend create some far better action sequences in this episode, b illustrating the futility of Synnamon's actions against the construct. So top marks this week from a visual point of view.

As for the story... Well, marks are taken off for such an important part of the story - Syn's epidermal tattoos - not being fully explained before they play such an important role. As said in previous reviews, this is mentioned in the frontipiece but hasn't been fully fleshed out in the story itself. It seems too much like a handy plot device as opposed to being hidden in foreshadowing at an early stage. That niggle aside, this is becoming a much more enjoyable read, although I can't help feel we're reaching the climax without really knowing how we got here in the first place. I still don't fully grasp what Kassad's trying to pull, outside of the usual universe-conquering, and I don't feel I know enough about Ascheta for all these revelations to be as shocking as they should be. Once again, I feel like I've missed a far simpler (but alas non-existant) introduction to Synnamon in earlier issues, and that this is actually her second tale. It still seems to me that too much is being tried too soon, but again, more may be revealed in the final part...

LS: So Synnamon was just play acting! It's an old one, but would have worked better if Synnamon's all over chameleon tattoo had been more clearly shown in the strip before this week (and not just explained in a text box on the nerve centre). We have a villain telling all to the heroine and then being conned into not killing her through some (not particularly convincing) last minute fast talking, so we‘re not dealing with anything we haven't seen before. Other than that, I suppose it will all come down to next weeks final episode to see if this can rise above the derivative elements in both character and story.

Artwise, Kassad's face made of spheres was a nice touch, and Laurence Campbell's art has, like Boo Cook's, improved over the course of the series. The colouring is a bit monotonous though, and I’m not sure shows off the art to its full potential.

Tadfraggers

Extra strength protection

Synopsis: A cyborg soldier with no memory finds himself defending a tunnel with no knowledge except how to fight and defend the "goddess". He and his crew are defending against an attack of thousands of creatures but they seem hopelessly outnumbered and ill prepared. The Sarge starts to hear the moans of the goddess and thinks she must be in pain, and needs his help. He rallies his soldiers and they manage to fight back all the tads that come their way. Success seems assured until a megatad rips through the sarge and infiltrates the "sacred treasure" they are protecting. The sarge has failed as we pan out and realise we are inside a woman's body who's just had sex with an alien. The alien is unsure that she's protected herself enough - but the soldiers were her contraceptive...

GH: Hmm - once again a Future Shock where I didn't see the end coming, but in retrospect bloody well should have. But it's an OK story. As with most Future Shocks you forget it almost instantly after you read the thing, but they do allow new talent to be showcased (although Spurrier clearly doesn't count). Newcomer Crutchley has the honour of being inked by Cliff Robinson this week. While there are certain elements of the inking that remind me of Robinson's style, it doesn't overwhelm the newbie's work - which seems promising. It'll be revealing to see how he inks himself, but in the meantime this is an acceptable start. As with most new artists, I feel I need to see a couple more strips before really getting to grips with their work, though.

LS: When they collected Alan Moore's Future Shocks, they called it (imaginatively) "Alan Moore’s Shocking Futures". When they collected his Time Twisters, they stuck with a winning formula and called it "Alan Moore’s Twisted Times". I'm left to sit here pondering whether a future collection of Si's stories will be called "Si Spurrier's Future Sex" - someone slip that droid some bromide! The story isn't so bad, but suffers from a bit of a weird start (does the nanobot need to be confused for the story to work?). Also, the "Goddess's" voice is actually two voices, but this isn’t made clear until the end, and is a bit of a cheat.

The art does the job, but I get the sense that Cliff Robinson's inking may hide a multitude of sins.

Part 7

Dreadnought bows out...

Synopsis: Karn says she'll enjoy watching Jude become a mindless zombie but Jude replies that Lazarus is a sentient planet using the dead to create its own army. They break into the prison led by Morgan and start attacking Dreadnought. Zombies are breaking in everywhere and after killing Dreadnought Holden has also escaped. Karn prepares to release the flesh eating viral bomb with a countdown of 20 minutes. Jude needs to reach the citadel, but Morgan thinks there is a way to bring the citadel down. It's held in place by laser tethers so if she can destroy two of these, the citadel will fall. They succeed and the citadel begins to fall, but Holden has returned, and using Dreadnought's electro whip has scores to settle with Jude...

GH: I'm still torn over this strip. In one hand there's the art of Boo Cook, which at times can be very, very good indeed. A particular case point here is the swarming of Dreadnought by the zombies, with a faded out effect that almost seems to emphasise his hopelessness. Cook's work on this has been preferable to that on Asylum, where everything seems a bit rushed at the end. There's still plenty of nice touches going on in here and his computer colouring also seems to be ever improving. And as for the story, it is actually kind of enjoyable in a "leave your brain at the door" manner. It's a brisk read, and doesn't seem to overstay its welcome.

However, on the flip side, that's something of a major problem too. The sentient planet creating an army explanation seems pretty poor, and I was hoping for some far wilder reaching explanations by the end of the story. Plus the part about destroying the tethers simply screams "video game" - along with Holden becoming the "final boss battle".

So while this has improved on earlier episodes, I still can't help feeling like I'm wasting my time while reading it...

LS: Back in my review for prog 1362, I claimed that DMW seemed like a "ragbag of old ideas". Unfortunately, nothing has happened to make me change that view - this week we have the "easily destroyed base" and the "final solution bomb" set pieces played out. The real frustration of reading this strip comes from the sense that everything is being made up on the fly, and nothing ties back in to previous episodes - So Jude was an undercover officer? Why then, when we hear her internal monologue in the early episodes does she come across as nothing more than a criminal who enjoys killing people and wants to escape by any means necessary? If she was an undercover officer reporting back on the cruelty of the prison, why did she make herself such a target? How can Holden speak this week, when his mouth was sewn up last week? If the planet gives the dead a choice to come back (last week "it" asks if Jude will help), why does Morgan agree, given it's his worst fear to return as a zombie? There seem to be too many of these unanswered questions, and little sense of what the story is actually about. It’s quite possible that there are answers to at least some of the above in the strip, but I don’t really have the interest to go digging. The fact that the answers seem incidental to the plot may well be the reason for my missing them and my disinterest.

The art is OK, but as the story doesn’t seem to know if it's a Prisoner Cell Block H in space or something deeper, it’s difficult to say if it suits it or not. Boo's art has certainly grown through the course of the strip, though I still wonder if he can (or even wants to) refine his art into a style that would suit something a little grittier, more realistic or darker.